Fancy a story? Grab a cuppa and settle in.
It’s officially Maccha Monday. This weeks Tea time is brought to you by the letter
“D”
Good Monday!
In reality -as I’m writing this- it’s really 3am on Friday morning as I’m once again fighting the inability to fall back to sleep. So instead of wasting another hour laying here, waiting for the nagging lower back pain from my Degenerative Disc Disorder to dissipate. It would be nice to move my legs…
Degenerative Disc Disease (DDD; Spinal osteoarthritis) is an incurable genetically passed disorder.
DDD occurs when the cartilage spaces in-between the sectional vertebrae in the spine dissipate at an arthritic rate.
This disease is common in older adults.
English please.
As we age, the organic matter we are made of starts to break down.
Over 40? Played excessive amounts of impact sports? Genes got ya down? Experienced popping or crackling in your ankles or knees when standing or bending? Intense death like pain cause a leg or two to go numb at 3am?
You may have experienced one of the varying levels of Middle Aged Arthritis.
Aging is fun, kids!
Now, take a moment and imagine that same symphony of pops, cracks and pain-
but running down your spine.
Add in the fact that your only 28 years old..
Welcome to yet another day where I will get to lay around the house, and lowcrawl myself most places because I can’t feel my legs again.
If you’ve never had the pleasurable experience of temporary paralysis, let me tell you.
Its only scary when you wake up and can’t move half of yourself…
for a minute or two.
It’s the searing, shooting pains ontop of the constant nagging pain. Not like your lunatic aunt who drinks too much at all family gatherings. It’s more like you’ve forgotten you took 2 laxative 8 hours prior, and as you’re hating life cold sweating your way right off the throne your stomach make a sound loud enough to wake the dead… meets the process of passing a 4mm kidney stone.
-OR-
Stubbing all your toes while simultaneously peeling your big toenails about 1/4
of the way back in a rolling motion.
Are ya with me?
As I mentioned, at the start of this thing, this is an INCURABLE disease.
I was lucky enough to inherit DDD genetically.
I was also lucky enough to not be tested at an earlier age to prevent a surgery I shouldn’t have needed for another 30 years.
No one was aware that I was carrying a silent disease, in the very foundation of my physical makeup. A disease that I would unknowingly pass… to my children.
This was only one of a number of medical pop ups that have happened through the course of my life. It just happens that I’ve managed to have the best and the worst luck in my personal game of lifetime medical roulette.
This photo was taken at one of the most painful times in my life. You wouldn’t know it by looking, but this is early 2011. I am 412lbs and 5 months pregnant. I am standing behind a white rocking chair which I had been leaning on to support my failing lower back. I am also standing strategically positioned to hide my belly and hips… the largest parts of me.
Just before arriving at my co-parents Grandparents house with our middle daughter, M and I stopped at the Fayetteville, WV Wally World so I could pick up a shirt that fit. I had rapidly outgrown my entire wardrobe, and was only getting bigger with every passing moment. Barely able to do anything except consume food, our son was growing and my health was starting to fade.
The pain had come to a point in my lower back, that with the pressure of Bubby inside my uterus… it felt like I was breaking in half. I knew something was wrong physically with me, but was willing to sacrifice myself for our unborn child.
Within 6 days of this picture, I was assigned to bed rest and rendered incapable of much more than wobbling to and from the bathroom. Counting the days until my 29th Birthday and consequently my expected due date, Aug 11th seemed forever away.
August 10, 2011
The day a very nice, older gentleman working as an Anesthesiologist tried to put an epidural into the non existent spine space on a laboring mother, who hasn’t eaten in 15 hours.
During severe contractions.
TWICE.
I can’t exactly recall the verbatim verbiage that was used.. but it’s been nearly 12 years and I still feel the need to apologize to the staff of Wytheville Community Hospital L&D.
Twelve hours, plenty of tears, and a few hangry rages later… I became the mother to a 11lb 9oz ‘Grumpy Little Man’.
Welcome to the world Bub. Now, someone better sort out a Wendy’s Spicy Chicken combo from across the parking lot, stat.
There is little in the world that equates to the deathlike pain that come with the reward of becoming a mother.
Even though I couldn’t walk, or even support myself upright due to the searing pain consuming my body.
I plainly remember the two nurses assisting me, the look in their eyes of pure empathy as I lay there pushing through all the pain and the now bleeding through the hospital sheets from the failed footlong needle epidural attempts.
I was incapable of sitting long enough without severe pain for the nurses to get the bandages on my back.
Yet, something about this little grumpy old man in my arms… the world was silent and nothing else mattered.
The next day was August 11, my 29th birthday. I gifted myself with a double tubal ligation. At 29 years old, I was no longer structurally sound enough to continue childbearing. My doctor has determined that months before. It was a miracle I was able to carry my son to term.
My DDD was so severe after years of neglect and carrying three children to term weighing 8 pounds or more- my body had started to break down.
One year and 8 days later, it happened. My first experience with temporary paralysis. My lower spine had become so degraded, without the surgery to repair the damaged spaces… I was slated to be wheelchair bound.
Not exactly the life a mother of active toddlers needs at the time.
I officially started my transition to Robo-Copism with the reinforcement of my spine.
I could go on and on about how the pain post op flowed like the ocean tides, but.. admittedly, sacrificing the range of motion was worth being able to walk.
Fast forwards to the present.. I am still constantly dealing with the endless challenges associated with early onset osteoarthritis.
It never gets any easier, it’s just some days are a little more intense than usual.
Thanks as always for stopping by and taking the time for a short story. I appreciate you and send healing vibes your way. May your adventures find peace. Hope to see you next time! -🍋💋
🚢💋SEDONA SUNSETS💋🏴☠️ 