I absolutely need to address something. Personally it stopped angering me awhile back, but still…

My orientation has nothing to do with my chosen profession.

There. I said it.

Over the course of my 19 years in professional kitchens, I have been approached numerous times on the subject. Especially, being an enlisted military female at the exact moment ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ was abolished.

From the awkward staring to the whispers when you enter a room… let’s shine a little light on what it is like to be a

Straight Female Kitchen Worker in todays society.

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Historically, it’s been the ladies holding down the kitchen. Although it seems sexist, it’s the fucking truth.

Be mad if you want. History isn’t fair, just or right. It is, exactly what it is.

I started full time in professional kitchens in 2009. Granted it was a military kitchen, I will admit to the fact it was nicer than any kitchen I’ve experienced outside. Everything worked and it was clean.

That probably seems like pretty low standards, but for those of you who’ve never been privy to the process that is a professional kitchen, I’d rather not ruin your peaceful time reading.

The one thing I NEVER had to deal with was the questioning of my sexuality. I was sexually harassed, but that was because I owned nice breasts.

Being a decent looking female in the military walking into a new unit is comparable to dancing the pole for the first time. You’re that cool drink of water for the oh-so-dehydrated masses. Nothing outweighs the feeling of being ‘fresh meat’. Eventually, it wears off and you’re just another daily target. At that point, it’s pretty easy to dust off the cheesy pick up lines and go about your day. Eventually one of the other girls would sleep with one of the guys, and that would be the gossip for everyone for awhile. Things were normal.

It was not until I moved to Arizona, into a civilian commissary kitchen, that I experienced the single most uncomfortable situation in my entire career. I was intentionally attacked because of my gender.

I am an educated woman. I am also very diligent towards my employer when I am tasked with a specific job. I pride myself on being able to back up my pretty mouth. I can also be very dependable should you earn my respect enough to earn that courtesy.

I am not one to stand around and look pretty while you work. I’m also not one to sit by quietly when I witness something that is dangerous or inappropriate.

That being said, I was constantly receiving inappropriate comments from my direct manager. Untruthful rumors were constantly swirling regarding my personal relations with different male employees. I’d be assigned the worst vehicles with no fuel card, and set 2 hours out. When the truck ran out of gas, myself and another female employee got told to figure it out. We were on AZ85, which is nothing but desert, and completely out of gas trying to get to a wedding the company had booked. How about the Christmas party where the Bus ran out of propane, and again I got blamed because I was the team lead and intentionally sent underprepared. I had told my direct manager the vehicle required propane before leaving… I got told it would be taken care of.

Eventually, after I was directed to hook the Dodge 3500 to the trailer and show up at a high dollar wedding…

I got fired the next week because I was the one losing the money on the events.

What is so ironic is, there is now a male operating in my position. He has presented himself the same way, and my ex boss cowers.

Sexism and Orientation discrimination are real. An employer will Gaslight until you fall, and refuse to stand up for what is right. It saddens and angers me that my friends are now subject to a fate such as mine because the problem still exists.

-🍋💋