Write about a few of your favorite family traditions.

Yall… what a crazy week. We made it! I don’t know about you but, I’m glad it’s Friday.

Albeit, personally this question falls in the land of the lost.

Family traditions drastically change when your the family member who stands up to join the military. The last holiday I celebrated with my family was Hannukah 2000.

They also drastically change when you aren’t raised by your actual family. However, I was also forced to make a decision to abandon my practicing religion once I had witnessed the atrocities humans afford other humans. Not to mention the calculated. abuse and purposeful abandonment inflicted at the hands of other upon baby, then adolescent and finally adult me. Plus the United States military didn’t openly offer synagogue services for Jewish enlistees during Basic Training.

There ain’t no way to break a person down and reprogram them to standard when their main boss told them they must rest from Friday sundown to Saturday sundown. Their solution was to offer me any of the Christian, Muslim or Catholic services being held on Sunday. Of course I took the invitation from my bunk mates. I would have been the only person left in the 150 man dorm bay, had I not. I was already a target as an enlisted band member in a band flight. That’s the price I didn’t know I was paying in order to avoid kitchen patrol (KP).

Funny enough, 12 years later I would end up running the same fucking kitchen at Lackland AFB, I refused to work in at 18.

From my perspective, maybe the Lords over Olympus had a point. Zeus reigning his mighty throne while his rather insidious sibling pact galavanted about cause dismay, disruption and fornicating the creation of half bloods all to their big brothers folly. Eh, sounds like some bullshit from any reality show these days.

Nowadays the holidays are spent quietly at home, watching tv with Tuna the moo-moo, and The Mysictial Overlord Gemini Prince (otherwise known as my bf, but he once told me he wanted to be called this if he had his choice.. so here you go babes!❤️)

I’m going to assume yall have had enough of me for today. So here’s your stupid little poem about what Jewish people do for food around Jesus’s birthday.

I hope you enjoy, and have a killer Friday! Baby’s back in her corner now!

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CHOPSTICKS & LATKES: A MERRY JEWISH FEAST

In the land of matzo balls and bagels so grand,
A tale of Christmas Eve, you’ll surely understand.

As Hanukkah candles flicker with glee,
Jewish folks ponder, “Where’s our feast to be?”

Lo and behold, a tradition so neat,
Chinese food on the menu, can’t be beat!

No silent night, just a loud “oy vey”,
As fortune cookies predict a festive array.

Dreidels spin with flair, as they dine with flair,
Chopsticks meet kugel in an epic affair.

Wontons and gefilte fish unite,
In a dance of flavors, oh what a sight!

So here’s to the Jews who on this night roam,
Through sesame chicken and sweet and sour home.

In yarmulkes and dim sum, they find their delight,
A Jewish Christmas Eve, so merry and bright!