Since my daily question from yesterday elected not to upload until I opened the app again at 5am today… 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬

More importantly how do you tell someone that it’s been going on for upwards of a year?

Or perhaps I should just apologize for having a 3 month period where I felt like I was finally going to be okay. I mean, I knew my Grandfathers death was going to hurt but I didn’t expect to get slammed with the second biggest betrayal of respect, lied to about it, and lose my job and my family all within 4 days of each other.

Now I am not sure I’ll ever be able to return to a place where I feel good about myself. I look in the mirror and see a face that is fading away and the exhaustion of sacrificing my years away.

The physical pain is a whole separate ball of yarn. I never asked for any of this.

I’m ready to be home. Wherever that may be. I can only hope that somewhere, somehow, sometime that place will become known to me. Until then I go and I come. Each day unyielding any relief, even when it’s done.