Dearest Gentle Reader,

I honestly don’t know what that fucking shit I posted this morning was.

You see, your author has been dealing with some very real in life issues. Simply taking the time to answer something like ‘is it cold?’ finds me less than tolerant.

Recently, a personal scandal has flooded my way.

I am not one to electively display my current romantic relationship to anyone other than my partner. I find it extremely uncomfortable speaking ill of an individual who has not slighted me in an aggressively egregious way.

That being said, I cannot help but feel the tidings of betrayal rising to my doorstep.

Let me clarify, the betrayal is coming at me.

Anxiety tells me that I am going to end up alone and homeless once again. The panic and self induced stress are once again completely out of control.

Abandonment Trauma tells me that I am not worth anyone’s time. Screaming that I once again have fucked everything up.

Depression tells me that it’s time to shut down once again. ‘You’ve always been and will always be your problem’ it snarls from deep down.

Then, the Demand Avoidance autism storms in and slams down its overly commanding foot. With a bellowing blast it tries to pull at the remembrance of one’s self. For a moment, there is warmth.

Then I casually open an app to find that the very issue I am struggling with has been published online, by someone that I thought was my friend.

It makes your author physically ill to think that the betrayal has come from within the walls of what was suppose to be my own home.

Yet, she is not stupid. There is no possible way for this to nearly be coincidence.

Once again the heartbreak of disloyalty stirs. Yet. She still tries, and cries.

Again, I apologize for the trash of this morning. To the 9 readers that liked it. Thank you.

Sincerely,

Trailer Trash Annie ❤️