Describe a family member.

Dearest Gentle Reader,

Society has long whispered of many things—scandal, fortune, and folly—but none quite as captivating as the curious case of familial behavioral patterns.

Every family has its peculiar treasures—and mine, it seems, was hand-picked by fate herself. Adopted at birth, it took Genetic Testing at 36 to finally gain access into this lively brood. I found myself among characters both charming and… let us say, distinctly spirited. None more so than one particular individual whose presence could curdle cream and yet somehow still make the entire table laugh.

He is, in the simplest terms possible, an absolute asshole—and I say this with both admiration and exasperation. For while his words could scorch the wallpaper from the walls, they are often followed by a grin so mischievous it’s impossible to remain cross for long. His humor lands like cannon fire—chaotic, uninvited, and yet thoroughly entertaining.

Indeed, dear readers, should you ever find yourself in his company, brace yourself. You will leave offended, delighted, and somehow oddly grateful for the experience. For while some men bring flowers, this one brings pure, unfiltered truth wrapped in the finest sarcasm—and dare I say, it suits him perfectly.

That’s it for another prompt. Stay salty and safe out there!